Novel_in_90: Day 10

PROJECT: Novel_in_90
TOTAL: 4704+754 = 5458

“We need a title.” The writer wandered on-scene with a slightly confused glance at the third cat. “And when did we start adding in side quests?”

“We don’t have a story yet, how can we possibly have a title?” The fictive looked up from cleaning one of the khail’s hooves. The animal gave a contented sign and leaned a little harder. The fictive gave up and let the hoof drop. “And he just showed up, blame Old cat for that one.”

The older of the original cats ignored them both with an appropriately feline aplomb.

“We need a title or I have to keep calling this ‘The Story Without a Name’, which, on the whole, is pretty lame.” The writer pondered trying to give Old Cat a head-skritch and then decided she was rather fond of keeping all four limbs. “Something about journey’s and upheavals and whatnot.”

“Which would sort of require that you remember to post the catch-up for Day 8, yeah?”

“Oh, right.” The writer nipped her laptop from a pocket dimension and posted the catch-up. “There we go, discussion of plotting posted and away!”

“You know, anyone reading this later is going to get seriously confused.”

“You’re the one that said first drafts are supposed to suck.” The writer tucked the laptop back into the pocket dimension before one of the khail took a hankering for a midday snack. “Now, back to titles!”

“I veto anything with ‘The’ or a magic plot coupon in the title.”

The writer gave her fictive a measuring look. “You do realize this is a High Fantasy story, right?”


“And yet, ‘no plot coupons in the title’.”



“No, just highly improbable.” The fictive grinned at her exasperated writer. “Heck, you can even pick something that makes no sense until later on in the story.”

“I think using a spoiler as a title might be frowned on, just a tad.”

“Like the back cover copy isn’t going to spoil everything to start with.”

“Mmm, point.”

“So, avoiding the word ‘The’ and any plot coupons you might have hidden up your sleeve… what have we got?”

“‘Death from the Mountains?’ I dunno… If it wasn’t summer I’d steal ‘Hushed and White With Snow’s title.”

“Yeah, no song lyrics either.”

“Spoilsport.” The writer looked over at the cats. “Any ideas?”

The cats continued to ignored her and the fictive rolled her eyes. “Right, ask the cats. I’m sure that’ll work.”

“Hey, can’t hurt to try.”

“Back on topic… I’m leaning towards ‘How to Survive the End of the World’, but that’s taking wild liberties with spoilers and clichés. Besides,” the fictive gave the author a withering look, “I’m still not sure I am surviving.”

“I make no promises.”

“Neither confirm nor deny, eh?” The fictive sighed. “Oh well, at least you didn’t start off with Book One of The Endless Cycle or somesuch. One book gigs aren’t that bad, all things considered.”

“You’re just trying to goad me into a trilogy, aren’t you.” The writer gave her fictive a suspicious look, “One book at a time, if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t know why I bother, we’re just going to end up with some bland two word title that sounds generically poetic.”

“If you don’t can it, I’m going to end up writing a book about writing a book.” The writer and the fictive glared at each other for a bit, which amused the cats.

“We could call it ‘When Mountains Attack!'”


“‘The Rocks Have Eyes'”

“Hell no, plus it starts with ‘The’.” Nahyl glared at the writer.

“‘Eyes, We Have Thems?'”

“You may not LOLtitle anything. Ever.”

The cats, however, were amused and the writer felt vindicated.

“‘Patterns of Stone’?”

“Hmm,” the fictive mulled the title for a moment. “Not bad, yet it still has that ‘generic fantasy’ feel to it. ‘Noun of Adjective’ is just a rehash of ‘ ‘Adjective Noun’. You could just as well call it ‘Stone Patterns’.”

“Be nice or I’ll call it ‘Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies’.”

There was a long pause.

“Seriously, I’ll do it. I’ll call it ‘Patterns of Stone (or: Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies)’.” The writer looked quite please with herself, as if resorting to RPG clichés as subtitles was somehow a good thing.

“Well, I suppose there are worse things to call a book… and at least they can’t claim false advertising.”

“Oh come off it already,” the writer snapped, “I’m not actually going to kill everyone.”

“Just mostly everyone.”

“Happy endings!” The writer grinned.

Martha Bechtel

My name is Martha Bechtel and I write fantasy and science fiction stories, paint small model horses silly colors, cast resin and plaster magnets, code random code (and Wordpress plugins)... Come on in and join in the fun!

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